on cultivating tenderness

On Friday my youngest daughter (pictured above) turns 7. And I will have a 7-year-old and an 8-year-old for a season. And it surprises me how long I’ve been doing this parenting gig. And how much I still feel like a complete novice. I’m still so unsure of what I’m doing and I’m still so very desperate to get it right for their sakes.

Often this manifests itself in an attitude of instruction, “please use your cutlery; don’t swing on your chair; please finish your mouthful before speaking.” Whilst this example is from the dinner table, some days it feels like my whole day is issuing instructions.

I have been pondering how I can cultivate tenderness in my every day. Thinking about how I can make my daily interactions less about the doing and more about the being with. Continue reading “on cultivating tenderness”

Embrace the stretch

I love my body balance classes. I love the way we start with gentle Tai Chi movements. Followed by the balance section of the class when we all try really hard not to wobble, then ab-workout which is always killer, and lastly the twists. Our instructor often tells us at this point of the class to ‘embrace the stretch’.

So I lean into the stretch and I feel my muscles lengthen and protest slightly in a good way.

It makes me wonder how often in life I actually lean into things that grow and stretch me. How often I embrace the stretch and how often I flat out resist it.

Continue reading “Embrace the stretch”

What I lack

I have been feeling the gap of late. The gap between who I am, and who I want to be. The gap between what I know and what I need to know. There is a steep learning curve and I am right at the bottom of it.

I am in a season of stretch. I am in a season of great exponential growth.

I have a deep sense of my inadequacy, my shortfall, and what I lack. I feel unprepared to tackle the season ahead.

Continue reading “What I lack”

watch your language

Be civil to yourself

Talk to yourself like you would to someone you love
Brené Brown

We have been having a conversation with our girls of late about how they talk to others.

This is more than a discussion about the words they use, but also about body language, attitude and tone of voice. It has been an interesting discussion, as sometimes they think they are being funny but there is an edge to their tone that they are unaware of. We sometimes have to role-play the difference for them to hear it.

Continue reading “watch your language”