the uncomfortable pause

grey beach

We have had a pause here, an extra day of rest.  A bonus on the end of our weekend that has allowed us just to chill and mellow with the family.

But so often we fill up these days too: “Woohoo, a holiday! Ok let’s tackle the jungle we call a garden; pick out the new paint sample for the lounge; redecorate one of the girl’s bedrooms; and cook the three course meal that we can’t do on a regular week night.” … Or is that just me?!

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leaf on grass

I was having coffee with a friend the other day and I was struck by her bangle inscribed with “live in the moment”. It initiated a conversation about just that topic and I went home and wrote the phrase on a post it note for my board.

But what exactly is a moment?

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bukowski quiet

It is quiet.

This week has been a big one for our family. Over the space of the last five days we have had:

Two Christmas concerts.

One little girl sick.

One final team dinner for me.

The yearly tradition of making dozens of mince pies with my mum.

A swimming assessment.

And a free dress day that I totally missed.

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pregnant pause

pregnant pause

December, the month of endings, the month of finishing, the month of preparation for a new year, a new beginnings. I love this time of year. But if I’m honest, sometimes in all the hustle of this season, I wish it all away and wish that next year was here already.

We are a people that are focused on the new, the novel, the next big thing. And we have tendency to want to skip over now and rush ahead.

I have not been able to shake this phrase over the last few months.

pregnant pause: a pause that gives the impression that it will be followed by something significant

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flowers in vase

Prompted by Elaine’s comment on yesterday’s post Now What? and a technique that Brené Brown uses, today I wrote myself a permission slip.

It says “you have permission to stop”.

As I wrote those words, others flowed out of my worn out and weary soul, and on to the page.

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